The Divorce Letters

I got this in my mailbox today. Its an old mail but I laughed again after reading it. Thought Ill share it here... Read on!

The Divorce letter

Dear husband,


I'm writing this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good woman to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.

Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk dress. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your games. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want anything
that connects us as husband & wife. Either you are cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Wife.

P.S. Don't try to find me. Your BROTHER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!


The Reply

Dear Ex-Wife

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my games so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a boy!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk dress: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.

I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me.

So take care.

Signed,
Your Ex-Husband, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my brother Carl was born as Carla (woman). I hope that's not a problem.


Cheers!
:)



Comments

  1. lol :D m still laughing at the thought of the reaction his wife wud have had reading his leter :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. not bad... pretty hilarious :) :)

    btw wud love to see some more of an Eng Hons kind of creativity...

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular Posts