They say everything in the world happens for a reason. Well I would say 'almost' everything, because there are somethings which just happen.. You know, just like that! Like my blog just happened JLT! Its about this and that and that! Some stuff that I write and some stuff from the internet. Read on!
I got this in my mailbox today. Its an old mail but I laughed again after reading it. Thought Ill share it here... Read on!
The Divorce letter
I'm writing this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good woman to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell.
Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk dress. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your games. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you are cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.
P.S. Don't try to find me. Your BROTHER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my games so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a boy!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk dress: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Husband, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my brother Carl was born as Carla (woman). I hope that's not a problem.
Rule: Even if you got her out alone, just when you are about to let her know about your feelings, she will spot a long lost friend (I guess from Kumbh ka Mela)
Corollary to Rule: The more desperate you are to tell your feelings to a girl on a private chat, the more probability the long lost friend she discovered is a handsome superman, who beats you in everything in the ratio 9:1.
Axiom: The more dedicated you are to the girl, the longer it takes before things work out, but ultimately it will (some smiles for the guys)
If u think a girl is beautiful, she'll always have a boyfriend to confirm that.
The nicer she is... the quicker u will be dumped.
The more the makeup, worse the looks.
99% of the girls in this world are beautiful. Remaining 1% would always be in your company.
The guy standing next to a beautiful girl can never be her brother.
If by any chance the girl you like , likes you too, she will let you know in about 10 years from now, when you are committed.
The more you ignore a girl, the more she'll want to be friends with you.
Theory of relativity - The more you run towards a hot chick, the more she goes away from you.
The day the chick you really like comes and speaks to you will be the day when-
You are dressed badly
You forgot to brush your teeth for the first time in your life
Have a bad hair day
All the good girls are either nuns or married. The rest go around with you and ruin ur money, health and leave you a total wreck.
The more seriously you like a girl, the more seriously her dad will hate you.
The love you shower a girl with, is directly proportional to the number of bullets her dad will be showering at you.